Monday, December 28, 2015

Judge or to be Judged!

This month we are featuring another great writer who is no stranger to the SisterAv brand. She has been a longtime friend and a great supporter. She has a great mind and a beautiful way with words, and has written a great piece on judgment!

"Once there was a girl in far, far away land. She grew up protected and sheltered, experiencing the least of what life had to offer and she liked it that way. She made many friends; she was well mannered and civil, and never spoke without having something meaningful to say.

One day, two of her friends told her a great tale of how they both hesitated to get to know who she really was because they surmised her a judgmental, goody-two-shoes who was the only person in the world capable of casting the first stone, completely different to how they felt of her now; a normal girl with normal feelings whom they could confide in, and drink Hennessy beers with.

The girl smiled and waited until she got home to cry very wistfully, and then she contemplated her friends' statements; realizing that they had judged her because they thought she was judging them! 

It's an unfortunate scenario that happens everyday between people, but why?

What makes people judge others? What is the difference between being judgmental and judging?

I think that making a proper judgment means to see or hear a fact of some sort and then silently form an opinion, and take action accordingly. We rightly do this everyday for many important decisions; life is navigation of choices; no one wants to be a na├»ve Nancy who never makes appropriate judgment calls, and is always in trouble.  But there is a fine distinction between being  "judging" and "judgmental", one is necessary and helpful and the other outright hurtful. 

It's hurtful because it denies us a chance of knowing our possible soul mate; or the greatest friend we could ever have; or the most satisfying job we dare to dream of. It's hurtful because it affects both parties' chances at happiness and that really sucks. 

The girl in far, far away land's friends didn't actually see any fact that proved she was a snob, they just thought she looked like a snob and acted appropriately according to that unfair judgment; to get as far, far away from the girl as possible, affecting their happiness and hers, because she was such a great drinking buddy!

 So let's never forget the principle that we must see or hear a "fact" in order for us to make a correct judgment about someone/something. Not only is it less stressful on our already anxious-prone minds, but it leaves our emotional doors not entirely opened and unsafe, but available to a point that Prince Charming could freely knock on it and ask for our hand. Prince Charming or Johnny Depp, your choice if you're not judgmental. ;3

Ps: Special thank you to SisterAv for allowing me be a featured writer on their awesome blog, they are two of the least judgmental peeps I know and I love them! Aww. 
Also, Hennessy beers are great!"

-trininaddums feature writer of SisterAv

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